This post is for you if you…
- desire a life of meaning and fulfillment
- think you can’t manifest your dream life
- want to know how to stop sabotaging yourself
The Purpose of this Post
I’ve been doing a lot of staring at nothing in deep thought lately. Usually triggered by scrolling through my Instagram feed, all it takes is one profound quote and immediately I am off into my own world. The gem I discovered this morning from Glennon Doyle was no different and is the catalyst for this post:
Glennon talked about her “dragons” and asked if anyone was brave enough to share theirs. Many did. Others had no idea what their dragon was. Glennon went on to say that the first thing to pop into your head when you saw that picture is your dragon.
As I read through the comments, it was patently clear to me that we all carry parts of ourselves with us we are not proud of. Most of us are so ashamed of them, we can’t even identify what our dragons are even though we drag them behind us like anchors everywhere we go. Yet we wonder why we are stuck where we are, unable to live a life that fulfills us.
The purpose of my post is to talk about how your refusal to acknowledge your dragons is sabotaging your efforts to create a life of meaning and purpose for yourself.
What Do You Long For?
When was the last time you stopped to think about what you truly desire in this lifetime? Go beyond the material aspect, I am talking about what will give you fulfillment and meaning. We are all here with a purpose and purpose is simply what motivates you to take the necessary steps forward towards your dream.
If you don’t know what you want to leave as your legacy, this is where you need to start. Getting clear on exactly what will make your soul sing.
Living aligned with your purpose is an accomplishment very few of us achieve because we make it harder than it has to be or we don’t take the necessary steps to move beyond the obstacles in our way.
You are a Manifesting Genius
You were born knowing how to manifest. You understood the principles of the Law of Attraction and how to use it to create your reality. As you grew, however, societal conditioning pushed this knowledge deeper and deeper into the back of your mind until you eventually forgot totally. Another byproduct of this conditioning was the formation of shadows (dragons), the parts of your authentic self that society deemed unacceptable.
As your shadows grew and multiplied, you learned to live your life in a way that made you the most comfortable, molding yourself into an admissible version of you. And that is where you are right now. Living a life for everyone but yourself and very possibly thinking this is all you will ever achieve.
What is Stopping You From Manifesting Your Dream Life?
You. There is no one else to blame for this except yourself. You are as free and fulfilled as you allow yourself to be. I know this may seem particularly harsh to some of you, but I think it’s time we moved beyond polite society and call it like it is. You have made choices in your life to put on masks to make other people feel comfortable while completely ignoring what you want. Rationalization of your choices is second nature and so ingrained in the way you operate that quite possibly you can’t see how the only person who is responsible for your life is you.
If you find yourself feeling resistance, irritation or downright anger over what I just said, your shadow just showed up.
Your Shadows are Fears and Your Fears are Illusions
So let’s talk about your shadow self. As I mentioned earlier, your shadow is the unacceptable parts of you that you wish would go away. I am going to let you in on a little secret: they never will. Until you learn to accept your shadows and integrate them back into your life, they will remain the obstacle in your path to manifesting your desires.
If we break down the shadow self into bite sized and palatable pieces, it’s obvious that they are simply fears you don’t want to think about. The good thing is these fears are just illusions you have created for yourself to keep your ego safe and protected from harm and can be rewritten into beliefs that don’t scare you. Think about what your dragons are: addictions you have, beliefs you have never challenged, behavior patterns that produce the same dreaded result. The first step is recognizing you have dragons and the second is digging into them to see where they came from. Most often, they are beliefs you formed as a small child and still operate on today.
Related Reading: How to Overcome Your Limiting Beliefs and Manifest Your Dream
Be an Alchemist: How Shadow Work and Manifestation Blend Together
There are many schools of thought out there that show you how to create your dream life and find the ultimate freedom and happiness. It is my firm belief that if you want to make a difference in the world, all you have to do is simply be yourself. This is your purpose. This is how you live your dream. This is how you find freedom.
Here is the rub though. Showing up as your authentic self is something few of us know how to do because we have forgotten who we are. We operate on unconscious beliefs but are unaware we do so. Our shadows embody these beliefs and the harder we try to push them away, the stronger they rise to the surface creating chaos in their wake. Put this together with the Law of Attraction and you find yourself trying to build a dream while simultaneously burning it down to the ground.
Understanding that the Law of Attraction states you attract what you focus on, you may think you are doing all the right things. Raising your vibration, visualizing the outcome, feeling the result in your body. But your shadow is doing the same thing and if you have not uncovered and healed your shadow wounds, you remain stuck. You can’t positively think your way into your dream life if you are still operating on unconscious behavior.
This is where you can channel your inner alchemist and blend the two energies together in a way that works for you and moves you towards what you desire.
What Shadow Work Gifts You
The Freedom to Stop Hiding
It’s exhausting hiding from yourself and others. When you refuse to acknowledge your dragons, you are telling your soul you aren’t good enough. I am going to say it again: you came here for a reason. You were gifted the qualities you possess because you are supposed to DO something with them. The only reason you believe some are good and some are bad is because you were brought up to think so. Aren’t you ready to stop playing someone else’s game and make your own rules?
A Return to Self-Love
Working with your shadow allows you to rediscover what an amazing human you are. You are so accustomed to finding all the things wrong with you that this is a concept a lot of us have a very hard time understanding. So until you can see it for yourself, I am here to remind you that you have a gift that we need. The longer you beat yourself up for all of your perceived flaws, the longer we have to wait for your magic. Speaking on behalf of all of us, start making friends with your shadow self. We need your medicine and you can only administer it if you love the amazing person you are.
Healing Your Wounds Heals Others
Shadow work is not easy. It takes dedication and a willingness to face very scary and very real dragons. By finding the courage to not only shine a light on your wounds but to take steps forward to facilitate healing, you automatically inspire others to do the same. You want to make a difference in your lifetime? Share your experiences with others. Be open and honest about your journey. When you stop feeling shame about where you hurt and accept these wounds make you who you are, you make a difference to those around you.
Uncover Limiting Beliefs
You can’t talk about shadow work without a discussion on limiting beliefs. These beliefs are what hold you back from your true potential and are old and outdated. Working with your shadow digs up these ancient ways of thinking and gives you the opportunity to challenge how you operate in your daily life. The enlightening part about working with your own limiting beliefs is the realization that a majority of your ideas on the way the world works didn’t come from you. You simply chose to adopt them as your own which further steered you off course. Challenge these beliefs and you uncover an entirely new outlook on life.
The more you work with your shadow, the more you understand that life is not as it seems. Your perception truly creates your reality and until you stop and question everything you think you know about yourself, you will stay exactly where you are. You have the ability to create whatever life you desire but first you have to do the dirty work. Facing your fears gives you the unique opportunity to experience a massive change in how you view your world. If you desire a life of meaning and fulfillment, you have to reach this paradigm shift and alter your current reality. Only when you have all parts of yourself on the same wavelength can you manifest whatever you desire.
Final Thoughts on Shadow Work and Manifestation
If you learned nothing else reading this, the one thing I want you to know is you must befriend your shadow if you want to be a successful manifestor. You may get lucky once in a while and achieve what you think you want, but how do you truly know what you want if you don’t really know yourself? I encourage you to get dirty and dig deep into your shadows so you can return to the manifesting genius you are and gift the rest of us with your amazingness along the way.
I want to know! How has shadow work helped you with your manifestation?
Proud introvert, intuitive entrepreneur, and spiritual activist. On a mission to embolden my fellow introverts to quietly change the world.